I ate a lot of this food I shouldn't have, earlier, and I keep jolting awake, hallucinating and sweating like crazy. I feel food just sitting in there, not going down because I was stupid, over ate. My esophagus is narrow because I'm hypermobile so I've had apnea since I was little, along with a severe over bite. I'm just now calming down from a severe panic attack. Every time in my life I've ever had a panic attack is not when I'm awake, it's always during sleep. I remember I ate chocolate cake once when I was 8 and had a night terror, jolted awake and ran around screaming during sleep walking, thinking something was after me. So I researched this a long time ago and it's parasomnia. But doctors always blame it on anxiety, but I've been going to therapy for over 20 years, took medication- Nothing helped. I have a few factors causing my apnea. The apnea is getting worse and worse and I feel like it's my fault, and I don't have a mask, I cant even get one, I have to get a second study wearing the cpap and I know I wont even be able to sleep because i won't be able to be at home to do it. I cant sleep in a new unfamiliar environment especially with a mask on me.
Sorry for rambling here, I feel alone, scared. All I keep repeating in my head is "I need sleep I need sleep and I will feel better" My boyfriend has been rubbing my back and holding me while I sob, I hate the hallucinations upon waking, they only last a few seconds but they bother me even though I'm used to them and I've had them since I was little. I don't want medical advice, I just want to know that I'm not alone and maybe someone else can relate, I need reassurance until I can get this mask because I think it will change my life. Thank you guys for being so sweet <3
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